Thursday, November 20, 2008

The Baby Cockfight in the Republican Party:
So in North Carolina, this dude films his two year-old son and another two year-old beating the fuck out of each other. Well, in as much as a pair of toddlers can beat the fuck out of each other. The father is a skeevy bastard, a former Special Ops soldier who is giggling and cheering them on like it's free sheep fucking night at the Durham Ultimate Fighting Championship. Truly, this is a man who should be kicked in the balls repeatedly until his nutsack ruptures (and the only reason one should stop kicking is so as not to get blood on one's shoes).

The Rude Pundit thought about the perverse thrill of watching people who still spend time sitting in their own shit viciously, without conscience, smacking each other silly while reading how conservatives have been wrestling with why they got their asses handed to them on Election Day and what direction the party should head. For truly, what else would you call it except what the media has dubbed the NC children smackdown: "baby cockfight."

You can pretty much expect that Kathleen Parker, Washington Post right wing columnist, is going to get gang-raped by depraved readers who need someone at whom to direct their barely comprehending, bestial rage. Parker, who already incurred the shit-fling of the 'roid right for saying that Sarah Palin was a stupid choice for VP, has written what most of the smart conservatives have been saying for years: "[T]he evangelical, right-wing, oogedy-boogedy branch of the GOP is what ails the erstwhile conservative party and will continue to afflict and marginalize its constituents if reckoning doesn't soon cometh. Simply put: Armband religion is killing the Republican Party."

To give credit, when you read the comments section, sure, there's a number of "Jeebus gonna git ya" type of shit. But what comes through most clearly is an almost orgasmic sense of relief that somebody said it. (By the way, let's not give too many props to Parker, who is an unrepentant liberal bashing kooz, more than willing to propagate the most extreme myths about Democrats. And the God-expelling column itself is way too full of "oh, I'm a-gonna get the bad e-mails now" cutesiness.)

But there's more than enough reaction to Parker so far to make for quite the baby cockfight:
"Faith is far more important than politics, and with Christians under attack from both the anarchists of the left and the intellectuals of the right, all of the vitriol might make believers think twice about voting at all." From the blog Credo.

"But please drop the nonsense about how the G-O-D people or the Palin people are low brows and beasts. There are low brows and beasts everywhere, on every side of the ideological spectrum. Maybe if you got more ecumenical hate email you'd realize that." From Jonah Goldberg, who does think that the GOP has gotten religion lodged too deeply in its sphincter but doesn't like Parker dissing believers. Always the courage of his convictions with this one. He really oughta be forced to sponge-bathe his mother.

"It's always a bad thing to throw the baby out with the bathwater. It's even worse to throw out the Almighty." From some fuckin' who-gives-a-shit blogger at Townhall who's quoted only because it's so damn stupidly funny.

With the rise of God's open door-lovin' Palin, the resurgence of preacher Huckabee, and the deep hope that exorcizin' Bobby Jindal won't seem too batshit, with David Frum, Christopher Buckley, and other conservative writers fleeing to neutral corners to lick their wounds and figure out what the fuck to do, you gotta figure it's another few years before these baby cocks figure out how to stop swinging their tiny little fists at each other.