Friday, March 03, 2006

How To Start a Civil War in the Republican Party, Part 1:
There's reasons that Karl Rove vomits blood at the thought of the Rude Pundit actually advising Democrats in a less bloggy, more official capacity: because the Rude Pundit knows how to use the Lee Atwater bag o' tricks that Rove has drawn from (along with a few thuggish sleights of hand of his own). What Rove knows is that having power is all that matters: how you get the power is so much shit under the fingernails of the elephant cage cleaners. 'Cause you can be as noble and as right-minded as you like: without the power, you can do fuck-all about your agenda. But once you have power, held high like the head of a deposed king, then the world can be yours.

Right now, the conditions exist to destroy the Republican Party from within, and it's all courtesy of the Dubai ports deal. If James Carville's a-readin', here's whatcha gotta know and do:

Look, let's be clear: if the 9/11 hijackers had been from Scandinavian countries, all lilywhite and blondely beautiful, and Finland was going to take over a bunch of U.S. ports, despite its previous connections to the, say, Lapland Liberation Front, there should rightfully be an uproar, but one can bet that it would not have been as huge a heave of revulsion as the Dubai Ports World deal has caused. Why? Because, and we gotta be honest here: the people from Dubai? They're not white.

And however much Democrats couch their outrage over the United Arab Emirates running parts of U.S. ports in terms of national security, administration incompetence, and the UAE's own sketchy record, the undercurrent of racism and xenophobia exists. Republicans are fuckin' scared to death that Democrats will be able to exploit this part of the equation. It's the reason that those screaming "Racism" at the top of their lungs are reliable lackeys, like Rush Limbaugh and Bill O'Reilly. Others on the right, though, are happy to fan those fuckin' flames.

The real mandate-worthy majority of the nation is against the deal, not because the people understand the ins and outs of port security and international business deals. It's because the country is from the Middle East. And, extra special added bonus, it's got the word "Arab" in its name.

Therein lies the key to wrecking the Republican Party. Just as the GOP wants to exploit African American churches, traditional bastions of Democratic support, by pushing the gay marriage issue, Democrats can exploit the latent racism of many supporters of the Republican Party through a few easy steps:

1. Whenever a Democrat appears on a talking head extravaganza (which, these days, is rarely), that Democrat needs to say the name "United Arab Emirates" repeatedly. Don't say "Arab nation" or anything that indicates you might be racially queasy about the deal. Just the real (English) name of the real nation. Constant repetition of the word "Arab" will make many, many Republicans disgusted with grief at their party selling out to non-whites. Democrats should do the same in speeches.

2. Whenever confronted with a Republican, a Democrat should try to get that Republican to take a stand, an especially tasty move for Senators: "Senator, do you support the President? Do you support your Senate leader, Bill Frist, who says he's 'comfortable' letting the United Arab Emirates run U.S. ports?"

3. Get word out into the Right Blogsylvania , the Freeper spit buckets (link from Pam's House Blend), and other real and virtual spaces to build a groundswell of momentum.

And how will these steps and more do the trick? How can one maintain that one has a soul after such actions? Ahh, since Clark Kent duties beckon the Rude Pundit, that will have to wait for Part 2.